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Writer's pictureFiona Marie

Embracing the Unique Journey: Why “Spiritual Bypassing” Misses the Bigger Picture

In the spiritual and self-help world, “spiritual bypassing” has become a hot topic. It’s often used to label or judge people’s spiritual paths, suggesting that some people are using spirituality to avoid deeper, underlying issues. But I see this term differently. I believe this idea can sometimes become a barrier to understanding the uniqueness of each person’s journey, overshadowing the real purpose of spiritual exploration: growth, self-empowerment, and evolution.


Each of us is here by choice—our soul’s choice—to encounter the themes, challenges, and growth opportunities that align with our individual journey.


No two people have the same path or lessons to learn, and by labeling someone’s path as “bypassing,” we risk imposing our own standards and expectations onto another’s personal journey. We risk missing the beauty of each soul’s self-designed evolution.


What is Spiritual Bypassing?


Coined by psychologist John Welwood in the early 1980s, “spiritual bypassing” was initially meant to describe the act of using spirituality to avoid dealing with emotional or psychological issues. It’s when someone leans on spiritual beliefs, practices, or platitudes to “skip over” the necessary inner work that many believe should accompany a true spiritual path. For example, if someone is deeply hurt or grieving, spiritual bypassing might involve dismissing their emotions with statements like, “It’s all part of the plan” or “Everything happens for a reason,” rather than confronting and processing the pain.

This term has been helpful for some, as it encourages deeper self-exploration and awareness. However, as it’s become popularized, it has also started to carry a judgmental tone, implying that there’s a “right” way to be spiritual and that any deviation from this path is avoidance or lack of commitment. This perspective can be limiting, and it doesn’t always recognize the richness and diversity of individual journeys.


Why “Spiritual Bypassing” Became a Popular Concept


As more people turned to spirituality to make sense of life’s big questions, some practitioners and thinkers in the field began to notice a trend: rather than processing challenging emotions, many people were using spirituality as a shield. They observed that individuals were often quick to embrace spiritual explanations for things—sometimes before they had a chance to fully explore or feel what was going on beneath the surface. In a way, the concept of spiritual bypassing served as a “check” for those in the community, urging them to balance spiritual growth with emotional honesty.

However, as valid as this concern may be for some, it has its limitations. People’s journeys are complex, and what may appear as avoidance to one person could be precisely what another person’s soul needs to explore in this lifetime. By imposing this lens on others, we might inadvertently create a hierarchy in the spiritual world, where certain practices or attitudes are deemed more “advanced” or “genuine” than others. This can lead to a culture of judgment and competition—ironically, the opposite of what spirituality aims to cultivate.


My Take: Embrace the Journey—All of It


From my perspective, each of us has unique core themes and challenges that our soul has chosen for our growth and evolution. These themes are personal, deep, and often layered, and they don’t always require us to confront them in conventional ways. In my experience, we cannot label someone’s spiritual practices as bypassing just because they don’t match our version of “doing the work.” Some may need to dive deeply into their emotions, while others find their growth through positive affirmation, lightheartedness, or even detachment.


Who are we to judge what someone else’s journey should look like?


Each of us has the inner wisdom to choose the approach that’s most aligned with our soul’s current path. The lessons we’re here to learn are as unique as our fingerprints. By calling out so-called “bypassing,” we may be failing to honor the ways in which each person’s growth manifests.


Instead of assigning labels or passing judgment, let’s trust that everyone is navigating their path exactly as they’re meant to, uncovering the wisdom, resilience, and love they need to discover in their own way and time. It’s through this trust, compassion, and openness that we can honor the true essence of spirituality: to see the divine in every journey and to embrace the diversity of paths that lead us all to the same destination—wholeness, connection, and enlightenment.


How to Cultivate an Inclusive Perspective on Spiritual Growth


  1. Release the Need to Judge Others’ Paths: Let go of ideas of “right” or “wrong” ways to be spiritual. Everyone’s journey is sacred and meaningful, even if it looks different from yours.

  2. Honor Diversity in Spiritual Practices: People heal and grow in countless ways. Whether through introspection, expression, or transcendence, each path is valuable in its own right.

  3. Seek Understanding Over Assumptions: If you’re tempted to label someone as “bypassing,” consider instead that they may be exploring growth in a different, perhaps unseen, way.

  4. Focus on Your Own Journey: True growth starts from within. When we focus on our own path and growth, we naturally bring less judgment and more compassion to others.

  5. Embrace Patience and Compassion: Remember, no two journeys are the same, and each soul evolves in divine timing.


Let’s move beyond labels and judgments, celebrating the vast spectrum of human and spiritual experiences. Instead of dismissing others as “bypassing,” let’s honor each person’s journey as a beautiful expression of growth, healing, and transformation. Embrace your path, trust your process, and encourage others to do the same. After all, we’re all here to grow, learn, and awaken in our own unique way. 🌌💫


xox Fiona Marie

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